What if I was to tell you that you could do just ONE thing with your child and it would create everlasting change. Does that sound too good to be true? It shouldn't, but to some parents it does and the reason why they do NOT choose to make this choice for themselves. However, now the choice is up to you.
Following through with your child after giving a directive is the difference most times between a child who makes good choices or bad ones. Why do I believe this? Because when we choose as parents to not follow through with good or bad incentives, we teach the child that there is either no reward for good behavior, or no consequences for bad behavior.
Not following through with consequences teaches the child they can do what ever they want without learning how their behavior and choices affect others. This is valuable knowledge we should be allowing our children to learn while with us, rather than having to learn it from others who do not love our children and care for them the way we do.
If we want our children to listen to us so they can in turn listen to their friends, teachers, other adults, police, and God, we have to be willing to follow through. Now most parents that have failed at follow through in the past will tell me that it doesn't work, because when they do follow through their child acts out more.
My challenge to them and to you as well if you too believe this, is to just try it for two weeks. That's right, give it a real try for two whole weeks and watch your child change their behavior and start making better choices for themselves. I have had multiple parents come back to me and say, "I would have given up, but I heard your voice in my head reminding me to stick with it for two weeks, so I did, and I am so glad I did."
Remember, if you have lacked follow through in the past, when you begin to stand by your word, your child is going to test you to see if you really will follow through. So this means that when they do begin to act out more that you are doing it right, or they would not be testing you in the first place.
Now I do have to caution, when following through I am not suggesting in any way that you should follow through with ANY type of abuse or neglect! I am just suggesting you follow through with directives that you are already saying and not actually doing. Like, "if you don't... I'm going to...". Take away the toy, tablet, etc. don't back down just because they act out.
Lastly, do everything you do in love, and remember you are an example to your child of the behavior you want from them by the behavior you yourself display.
Be blessed, until next time!
Is this you?
.Do you want to know God more? Do you want someone to help you do so? Do you want someone to walk alongside you who has been in your shoes? Do you feel alone? Do you want to experience the healthier and happier you?