Codependency in Relationships...

What does a Codependent relationship look like? For starters, being in a codependent relationship is more common than you may realize. So don't feel alone if you identify with being codependent yourself.

First why does God talk so much about fearing man and what the world thinks in the Bible? The reason is because God has created each of us in HIS image and HE wants us to focus on what God thinks about us and not what others do!

When we are in a codependent relationship we will in most cases change what we think, look like, believe, care about, etc in order to gain the approval of the person we want to love us.  Believing that if we only change ourselves to be what they desire that their desire will be for us and no one else. We look for others to fill the need to be loved that only God can fill!

The sad thing is that when we loose sight of who we are, what we like, believe or even want for ourselves, we have to take time to figure it out again.  And unless we fight for it we will continue to live in the cycle we live in.  We have to recognize that we no longer have to fear what others may think and no longer fear we will fail others. We have to believe that we can change because God designed us and He loves us and accepts us for who HE has made us!  We are Loved... Cherished... & Accepted...

When we base our lives off of the approval of others, or the fear of failing we are always going to be let down. We will always get to a breaking point where we can no longer go on being unseen.  The problem is, when this happens we blame the very people that love us the most and believe that they are the problem, when it is us all along.  

What I mean is this, no one can make us someone else unless we let them!  We have to understand that we are not responsible for others thoughts, feelings, decisions, desires, etc and we must choose not to step in and take responsibility for things that are not ours to carry.

We have to learn to love ourselves again, and then love others where they are to help instill hope in them that they too can find happiness in the person God has designed them to be.  When we learn the desires, passions, gifts and talents that God has created in us to be HIS hands and feet with, we start to become the person we always wanted to be!

There are many steps to take to gain the freedom from codependency that we desire. The first should be asking God how HE sees us and starting to believe that about ourselves, and not what others think of us. Remember you have the power to change, you just have to choose to listen to the right messages about yourself!